In What Way Is One a Lay Follower?

On one occasion the Blessed One was dwelling among the Sakyans at Kapilavatthu in the Banyan Tree Park. Then Mahānāma the Sakyan approached the Blessed One, paid homage to him, sat down to one side, and said to him:

“In what way, Bhante, is one a lay follower?”

“When, Mahānāma, one has gone for refuge to the Buddha, the Dhamma, and the Saṅgha, in that way one is a lay follower.”

“In what way, Bhante, is a lay follower virtuous?”

“When, Mahānāma, a lay follower abstains from the destruction of life, from taking what is not given, from sexual misconduct, from false speech, and from liquor, wine, and intoxicants, the basis for heedlessness, in that way a lay follower is virtuous.”

“In what way, Bhante, is a lay follower practicing for his own welfare but not for the welfare of others?”

“When, Mahānāma, a lay follower is himself accomplished in faith but does not encourage others to accomplish faith; when he is himself accomplished in virtuous behavior but does not encourage others to accomplish virtuous behavior; when he is himself accomplished in generosity but does not encourage others to accomplish generosity; when he himself wants to see bhikkhus but does not encourage others to see bhikkhus; when he himself wants to hear the good Dhamma but does not encourage others to hear the good Dhamma; when he himself retains in mind the teachings he has heard but does not encourage others to retain the teachings in mind; when he himself examines the meaning of the teachings that have been retained in mind but does not encourage others to examine their meaning; when he himself has understood the meaning and the Dhamma and practices in accordance with the Dhamma, but does not encourage others to do so: it is in this way, Mahānāma, that a lay follower is practicing for his own welfare but not for the welfare of others.

“In what way, Bhante, is a lay follower practicing for his own welfare and for the welfare of others?”

“When, Mahānāma, a lay follower is himself accomplished in faith and also encourages others to accomplish faith; when he is himself accomplished in virtuous behavior and also encourages others to accomplish virtuous behavior; when he is himself accomplished in generosity and also encourages others to accomplish generosity; when he himself wants to see bhikkhus and also encourages others to see bhikkhus; when he himself wants to hear the good Dhamma and also encourages others to hear the good Dhamma; when he himself retains in mind the teachings he has heard and also encourages others to retain the teachings in mind; when he himself examines the meaning of the teachings that have been retained in mind and also encourages others to examine their meaning; when he himself understands the meaning and the Dhamma and then practices in accordance with the Dhamma, and also encourages others to practice in accordance with the Dhamma: it is in this way, Mahānāma, that a lay follower is practicing for his own welfare and also for the welfare of others.”

Mahānāmasutta AN 8.25 https://suttacentral.net/an8.25